MARRIAGE COACHING SERVICES
There is a way out of loneliness and resentment that doesn't involve divorce.
Most people don’t need a new relationship partner; they need a new relationship pattern.
If you’ve entered that distressing phase of marriage where things seem broken, it’s not you. It’s those pesky patterns that aren’t suited for this level of marriage.
Once you discover effective patterns, your marriage enjoyment goes way up.
Better Days Framework
Relationships grow and change; we experience pain when our patterns lag behind.
The Better Days Framework identifies where your marriage has grown and changed AND which patterns didn’t get the memo that it’s time for an update. It’s normal that our patterns get stuck in the past. But when those patterns start to do more harm than good, you may want to consider doing something about them.
When you’re ready to trade-in the old patterns for the newer models, the Better Days Framework is at your service. Every client I work with gets this framework.
Personalized Coaching
“One size fits all” might work if you want a rain poncho, but if you want to enjoy your marriage again, or at least stop hating each other, a cookie-cutter approach usually doesn’t work.
This is where personalized coaching can, if the coach is the real deal, meet you where you are to customize the timing, techniques, and tools just for you. This facilitates progress and implementation of new patterns into real life.
Individuals & Couples
Your specific marriage issues might benefit from couples coaching, individual coaching, or even a combination of both. Both are useful and effective for different reasons. Primarily, couples coaching is the preferred way to get started, but not in all cases.
And I know, traditional couples counseling/therapy/coaching has a lackluster track record, and that is being generous. Talking in circles, the professional in charge staying neutral, and spending the whole session rehashing the fight of the week are some of the culprits of its ineffectiveness.
But when the Better Days Framework is used, along with directive, respectful, truthful, healing leadership, now we are making traction and seeing couples find their “us” again.
Why does the Better Days Framework help couples?
If you think about taking a road trip, there are 3 main steps
#1 Starting point
#2 Preparing for the journey
#3 Driving down the road for adventure
What happens if we don’t do step #2, preparing ourselves and our car for the journey?
This is what happens. Someone is tired and cranky, a tire has low pressure, a bathroom stop is needed 30 minutes in, the car is low on gas, favorite sunglasses left behind, everyone needs food and water, and about that time, we wished we hadn’t decided to go on a road trip after all. Preparation is king.
I see this happen when couples attempt to change their marriage on their own, even sometimes when they work with a professional. They aren’t given a chance or walked through the process of “preparing for the journey.” And therefore step #3, using the new patterns in daily life, doesn’t go well.
Human beings can change, hallelujah for that. Some things we can change very quickly, while other things need the “preparing for the journey” process. Without the gains from this necessary step, attempts to upgrade our relationship patterns leave us frustrated and discouraged.
This is the road trip equivalent for relationship change
#1 Starting point – identify current stage of marriage & patterns
#2 Preparing for the journey of new patterns
#3 Living life’s adventure with new patterns
I designed the Better Days Framework and personalized coaching to support all three steps of change, including and emphasizing step #2, preparing you for the new patterns. This step even helps the part of us, we all have one, that honestly doesn’t want anything to do with new patterns. Yes, even that part, sometimes especially that part, gets compassionate attention while we work together.
For those who dread "this kind of stuff," they enjoy the Better Days Framework.
Why? Because clients regularly feel better instead of worse. The work we do together is engaging, personalized, and purposeful. It’s inviting & accessible, allowing people to see themselves and their relationship in new ways.
Who wouldn't love this?
Couples who use the Better Days Framework experience:
Less defensiveness
Less criticism
Less dismissiveness
Less loneliness
Less resentment
More ownership
More teamwork
More attentiveness
More connection
More support
